That was one of the first times I ever felt like a had a talent and I could use it. I wasn't the best, I wasn't the most experienced, I made mistakes, but I did it. I did it for God.God.Today is Sunday, the day specially reserved to honour God. Today at church we talked about the church, what a church is, and how we, the believers, should grow as Christians.I felt so guilty, because the teacher spoke of how Christians should be differentiated from non-Christians. As in, Christians should not follow blindly if others curse, swear, cheat or lie. Others might not care, but we should. I'm not saying ALL non-Christians are like that okay. Note the 'if' and 'might'. And admit it, anyway. Christians, like me, can be guilty of those too.Take a look at my class. The Christians in my class also curse and swear. How different are they from the non-Christians then?Although I don't use vulgarities (the worst I've come to is 'damn' and 'oh my gosh'), I feel that I should make it clearer that I am a Christian with my own believes.Today we also talked about serving in the church, as a sub-topic. Just yesterday, I attended a music day camp in church. The daoshi asked each one of the pianists what grade we held in piano, and I was surprised to find out, that I was the only one with a grade 8 pass there. Compared to in HMP, where a grade 8 pass cannot guarantee the quality of your playing, and a grade 5 pass holder can very possibly score better than a grade 8 pianist in an assessment, I felt... proud of myself. A teeny weeny bit, but still, yeah.Of course, I couldn't improvise as well as the more senior pianists (okay lah, not so senior, but still my senior right) who had been playing for the youth service for so long, but compared to the others who were new to playing for the youth service, I guess I was rather okay. I was even more surprised when the daoshi reassured me with a 'good, I think you're fine.' when we played rather impromptu for him. I thought I was horrible! I practised for less than 5minutes on the spot, while the others practised for 30 min (I couldn't find a free piano to practise on). I had always compared myself to the other HMP people, feeling inferior to some of them. I never considered myself as having musical talent. I just barely scrape throught all my assessments...Then another senior in the church asked me if I wanted to be the youth choir's pianist.Well, what do you know? I'm being talent spotted? If you call that... a talent? I cannot bring myself to accept that. I honestly never thought I was good. Still considering that invitation and praying about it, I guess I should really learn to be more confident huh? I really shouldn't compare myself to the other pros out there. For God, I'm good as I am, so long as a have the heart to worship and serve Him. Of course, I will continue to strive, to improve, and to surpass myself, not anybody else.to serve, to strive, and not to yield.